what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
