I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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