In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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