He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
