don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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