Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
