just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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