thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
