he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
