brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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