At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize