he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
