Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
