1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
