Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
