Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
