I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I understand Curling. That high.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
