I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
