i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
