I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
