It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Im just a social blackout drinker.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
