I hate your face
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Randomize
