butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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