honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize
