I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
