Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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