he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
