Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize
