What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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