She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
