how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
