im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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