I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
