I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize