sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
He felt like a one man threesome
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Randomize
