I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
