Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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