i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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