we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
