How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Randomize
