Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Randomize
