i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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