We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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