She said her name was "party"
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
