Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Randomize
