i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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