bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
