there was a trapeze. enough said
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
