And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
