I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
